Contrary to what you may have read in some other publications, Josh Hazlewood’s hamstring injury is a massive boost to Australia’s hopes of victory in the first Test in Perth. The 34-year-old, you see, has proven beyond all doubt over an 11-year international career that he is a terrible hindrance to his team.
Since the Tamworth-born terror made his Test debut in December 2014 he has played in 76 of Australia’s 107 Tests, of which they have won 39 (51%), while losing 24 (32%). Decent numbers, but it’s when you strip him from the side that they really thrive, with 22 wins (71%) and just five defeats (16%) in 31 games. His impact in the Ashes, if anything, is even more damaging: they have won 50% and lost 33% of their 18 games with him, but won 71% and lost just 14%, a single rogue game, of their seven without his malign presence.
In the last week of October, for the first time in 35 years, there were no rap songs in the Billboard Top 40. This is positive news for England, who have been rocked by the rise of rap: before Rapper’s Delight by the Sugarhill Gang became the first such track to make the Billboard Hot 100 in January 1980 England had lost a trifling 38% of their Tests against Australia (and won 33%), but since then they have lost 50% and won just 27%.
During the period of weekly rap-charting that started with Biz Markie’s Just a Friend hitting the top 40 in February 1990 their performances had been worse still, with defeats in a huge 55% of all Tests and a win percentage of just 26%. Perhaps the decline of rap can help Brendon McCullum get a tune out of the English at last.
David Szalay’s Booker prize win continues a remarkable run for people with the letter Y in their names, after successes for Paul Lynch in 2023 and Samantha Harvey last year. It is the fifth time there has been a Y-inclusive Booker winner in the year an Ashes series starts in Australia, after Stanley Middleton, joint winner in 1974, Thomas Keneally in 1982, Kingsley Amis in 1986 and Yann Martel in 2002. This tends to be a bad thing for England: on three of the previous four occasions they won one Test and thereby lost the Ashes either 3-1 or 4-1, with only their Amis-inspired success in 1986-87 to fall back on – Australia’s 75% win record in these years comfortably beats their all-time figure of 52%.
There have been five occasions when a Y-inclusive author won the Booker in the year of an Ashes series in England – Roddy Doyle in 1993, Arundhati Roy in 1997, Peter Carey in 2001, Hilary Mantel in 2009 and Lynch. England have also won only one of those series, losing three and with only Mantel’s Wolf Hall bringing them any luck.
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Europe winning the Ryder Cup is also bad news for England. While the tournament was contested between America and the United Kingdom, British victory would signal English victory, both in 1929 (England won the Ashes in 1928-29) and 1933 (England won in 1932-33). For a while after it became a pan-European side the trend continued (Europe and England won in 1985, England in 1986-87 and Europe in 1987). But since then European success has landed England in the deep rough, with only 2010-11 (Europe won in 2010) switching things around. That apart Europe wins in years when Ashes series either started, ended or were played in their entirety brought Australia success in 1989, 1994-5, 1997, 2002-03, 2006-07, 2013-14 and 2017-18, while in 2023 England had to come back from 2-0 down to grab a draw.
