My mother, Shirley Cargill, who has died aged 89, made a name for herself by creating beautiful surroundings at her large family homes in Norfolk: first at Alby Hall near Cromer and then at Elsing Hall near Dereham.
The interiors she created in both places were bold, original and constantly evolving, while for their gardens she favoured a romantic and instinctive style, filling the grounds with roses and championing the wild self-seeding style that is now widely favoured.
Her flair in both regards led her to be called upon for unpaid advice on the design of a number of gardens and house interiors across Norfolk and Suffolk, as well as in London and the US (sometimes with her friend George Carter), and she was always on hand to provide tips for friends and relatives with their own projects.
Beyond that sphere, Shirley’s advocacy of the arts led her to become chair of the Norfolk Contemporary Arts Society between 1976 and 1989, after which she served as a director of the Norfolk Churches Trust from 1991 to 2001.
She was born in Halesworth, Suffolk, to Beresford Williams and his wife, Gwendolyn (nee Leathers), who managed the family farm. She left school to do clerical work in Norwich until she married David Cargill in 1960, after which she concentrated on raising their young family and managing their home, which from 1962 to 1982 was Alby Hall. The house rang with laughter; its doors were perpetually open, and guests were welcomed with effortless warmth to long, convivial dinners and impromptu gatherings.
The family then lived from 1982 to 2007 at Elsing Hall, a medieval moated house that Shirley patiently transformed from an exquisite but dilapidated shell to a magnificent romantic dream. She filled the garden with old-fashioned English and French roses, fostered a dramatic formal yew topiary, planted avenues of gingko, groves of flaky-barked birch and left lawns unmown to encourage back their long-lost wildflowers.
Country Life described the house and garden, which were often open to visitors, as Norfolk’s best kept secret, and the designer and writer Isabel Bannerman declared the garden her favourite.
Shirley’s eye for beauty was mirrored in her own personal style, which reflected her confidence and originality: she wore antique Chinese robes with as much ease as her comfortable gardening clothes. She had boundless creativity, generosity and a deep delight in life.
After a separation from David in 2007 she moved to a much smaller property in North Tuddenham, Norfolk, where her gardening and entertaining continued for as long as she could muster the strength. In her last summer she sat in the bay of her drawing room with its doors open, from where she could view and contemplate the beauty of nature.
Although she and David lived apart in their later days, they remained close until he died in 2023. She is survived by her children, me, Jonquil and Angus, and six grandchildren.
