VARDISSIMO
It was fitting that Jamie Vardy was given an audience at the Violin Museum in Cremona, because at least they had access to a very small one to play for the striker about having to finish his career in picturesque Lombardy rather than the East Midlands. He is also a classical showman but, aged 38, some suspect that the former England international is a spent force. Vardy has been doubted from Stocksbridge Park Steels to the Champions League, though, and has always delivered. “It is up to me to disprove the predictions,” he chirped. “Age is just a number. I always listen to my legs. At the moment I still feel great. During my whole career I have been underestimated and I worked to prove everyone wrong, and I have succeeded in doing that.”
It is fitting that a man from Sheffield has joined a club owned by a man who makes his money in the metal industry. Vardy is not the first English player to think he can show the Italians how to run in behind. Cremonese will hope he can be more successful than the likes of Danny Dichio and Franz Carr. A willingness to learn the language will be important for Vardy, so he can follow more in the footsteps of David Platt and Paul Gascoigne. The former was fluent, ticking off Bari, Sampdoria and Juventus over a four-year period. With the best will in the world, Vardy is unlikely to be banging them in come 2029. What he could do, however, is follow Platt and Gazza’s lead by opening his arms and doors to the television cameras. No one has ever expected Vardy to make a great access-all-areas documentary, so this is surely his chance. The Englishman could show James Richardson how to make a basic pasta dish, take part in a sketch involving a goat anecdote or at the very least invite Elvis Costello to give his verdict on Vardy’s move: a Brilliant Mistake or just Beyond Belief.
Documenting Vardy’s life in northern Italy would be fascinating as he adapts to playing abroad for the first time, swapping the Skittles for torrone, Red Bull for espresso and Marsala wine for the port. Throw into the mix Vardy’s wife, Rebekah, and The Last Dance will be quaking in its Air Jordans.
This has the potential to be a TV extravaganza. Cremonese are third in Serie A with two wins in as many games after promotion, including a 2-1 shoeing of Milan at San Siro. Vardy has joined a team on the up and could make his debut on Monday at Verona, potentially playing alongside Benito Mussolini’s great grandson, Floriani. Vardy has already been given the nickname “StradiVardy” thanks to his new home city’s links to the violin. If he can mix banging in the goals with learning the art of the strings and bow, the possibilities are endless. “The main task is making sure we stay in the league, and that’s how it was when I was at Leicester,” Vardy boomed, leaving out the ending. For the sake of everyone, the final evolution of his career needs to be televised.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
“Everywhere I go I feel pressure as a refugee, like I always need to identify myself. I accept that I am a refugee, but I had to leave my country, I had to start again and I just want people to understand what we go through as refugees. I shouldn’t have to tell my story over and over again” – Elaha Safdari, a goalkeeper from Afghanistan who was evacuated to the UK when the Taliban returned, talks to Suzanne Wrack about her struggles finding a team and being accepted in Britain.
“Your mention of Ireland surely failing to qualify for yet another World Cup and the consolation of watching Saipan [yesterday’s Daily] got me thinking. Any chance of Steve Coogan taking the Republic job and the present manager going back to his first love of dentistry?” – Patrick Fahy.
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‘The more money you have, the more problems you have’ insists Kylian Mbappé [yesterday’s Quote of the Day], a footballer ‘disgusted’ by the industry that earns him a salary of over €31m a year plus bonuses, while suing his former club for €55m. The latter figure is equivalent to the GDP of the Pacific nation of Tuvalu. I’m comfortable with either a stuffed brown envelope or cheque in the post if he ever wishes to ease his sorrows” – Martin Clifford.
Send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s prizeless letter o’ the day winner is … Patrick Fahy. Terms and conditions for our competitions can be viewed here.
