Key events
6 min Things calm down briefly and then Brennan Johnson dances into the Everton box and causes palpitations, without anyone having a shot.
“Your entertainment (?) this evening comes courtesy of 2 teams who make up a third of of the Magnificent 6,” says Jeremy Boyce. “That is to say, the only 6 teams never to have been relegated during the mightily-impressive Premiership era! And so, given the gazillions of zlotys that have gone in to placing the Premiership where it is today, the envy of all the other leagues who can only dream of eating turnips for dinner and maybe scraping the odd domestic trophy or two, neither of these have come anywhere near their historic triumphs in the modern age. Both have great players, decent managers, lovely new stadiums and possible cheese availability. But they are serial under-achievers, which one will under-achieve best tonight?”
3 min Chance! Grealish and Mykolenko combine to push Everton into the box, but nobody can get a shot in. Then Ndiaye wriggles down the right, past Spence, and cuts back to Beto – who can only deflect it to Grealish. His shot is well blocked by … someone.
2 min Everton go long and for one mad moment it looks as if two of their players are through, but the ball bounces kindly for Vicario.
1 min The knee is taken (to some boorish boos) and so is the kick-off.
The teams are out there and Thomas Frank is gazing out at the field with a thousand-yard stare. Bit early for that.
An email! “I shan’t bore you,” says Gary Naylor, “with the travails of travelling from Glasgow to London today via a stop off at Hill Dickinson, but I’m standing on a train at Warrington now and my seat at the match is vacant.” Noooo.
“Yesterday I couldn’t get in Lesser Hampden as Queen’s Park vs Ayr United was sold out.
“It’ll be worth it if Everton win while Liverpool lose though.”
Fun fact! A month ago Liverpool, who hadn’t lost or drawn a league game, were 12 points ahead of Aston Villa, who hadn’t won one. Now they’re level, both on 15 points. Villa have won every game since and Liverpool have lost the lot. It’s a funny old season.
The results are in from the 2pm games. Arsenal have beaten Palace 1-0, Bournemouth have beaten Forest 2-0 and, less predictably, Villa have beaten Man City 1-0. So Arsenal remain well out in front, with Bournemouth tucked in behind them – and City trailing Sunderland. At the other end, poor old Wolves have succumbed to a last-ditch winner from Burnley.
Spurs are now eighth and Everton 14th, although that doesn’t count for much in this rollicking roller-coaster of a season. The gap between them is only three points. Spurs may be well ahead on goal difference, but it’s nothing Everton can’t fix with a 4-0 win.
Teams in full
Everton (4-2-3-1) Pickford; O’Brien, Tarkowski, Keane, Mykolenko; Garner, Gueye; Ndiaye, Dewsbury-Hall, Grealish; Beto.
Subs: Travers, Coleman, Aznou, Alcaraz, Rohl, Iroegbunam, Dibling, McNeil, Barry.
Spurs (4-2-3-1) Vicario; Porro, Danso, Van de Ven, Spence; Palhinha, Bentancur; Kudus, Simons, Johnson; Kolo Muani.
Subs: Kinsky, Gray, Byfield, Bergvall, Sarr, Scarlett, Odobert, Tel, Richarlison.
Teams in brief
Grealish starts! As does Randal Kolo Muani, ahead of Richarlison, who will begin his own derby on the bench.
Preamble
Afternoon everyone and welcome to … well, take your pick. Welcome to the darkest afternoon game of the Premier League season so far. Or welcome to the Richarlison derby. I said this to Paul, the editor who doles out the matches to us writers. And he came back with the Vinny Samways derby, which was a better line. We didn’t even get as far as Gazza, let alone Gary Lineker.
If Everton and Spurs had met a month ago, you’d have said it was two teams on the rise. Then Thomas Frank’s Spurs went a bit Spursy. But that was at home: they remain top of the away table, and even with a few injuries they should be a headache for David Moyes. He may have to manage without Jack Grealish, who, when he escaped from Man City, took about five minutes to become (a) his old self and (b) Everton’s new talisman.
On form there’s nothing to choose between the two sides. Both have won two, drawn two and lost two of their last six league games. Everton have had a full week to rehearse for this, whereas Spurs had a trip to Monaco for a Champions League stalemate. Truth be told, anything could happen. Back soon with the teams.







